Monday, August 22, 2011
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Friday, January 14, 2011
..when will this stop...
hi...
I'm MELODY M. REYES hoping for a big change. A person with a big heart, big smile and big dream.
But things change, I'm now a person with a big broken heart, big sad face and big failure in life. I want to start all over again. I want to be rebirth, but how if I couldn't left the past. Even i have those changes I still hold on the past. I couldn't start my life because of him. I've been hurt countless time. I already forgive, forgiving and will be forgiving a person. I always asked what is /are the matter/s with me, I've been loyal, I've been loving him for so long, I've been doing things that i know will makes him happy. But all of those things seem to be worthless.
What else should I do to bring him back, to bring what we both have before. For so long I'm hoping for a change, but also for so long I've been hurt.
I already losing that hope, but I wont stop 'till I found the final answer for a BIG QUESTION which is "WHY".
But things change, I'm now a person with a big broken heart, big sad face and big failure in life. I want to start all over again. I want to be rebirth, but how if I couldn't left the past. Even i have those changes I still hold on the past. I couldn't start my life because of him. I've been hurt countless time. I already forgive, forgiving and will be forgiving a person. I always asked what is /are the matter/s with me, I've been loyal, I've been loving him for so long, I've been doing things that i know will makes him happy. But all of those things seem to be worthless.
What else should I do to bring him back, to bring what we both have before. For so long I'm hoping for a change, but also for so long I've been hurt.
I already losing that hope, but I wont stop 'till I found the final answer for a BIG QUESTION which is "WHY".
Friday, October 15, 2010
...surrender..
....u've been cheating on me for so long.......at first i refused to accept it...i told my self.."No, he can't do it on me"...
...but now...even its hard to accept but its real...
... i need to make a step that will help me to stand again...and be with my real happiness...
...and for sure..it is not by your said...
...'coz for almost 2 years..i never been happy in real...
...every time i went to my room and seems everything was so quite I can't stop reminisce those times that i was so in love and happy being with you..
...and after that very moment...i would remember how stupid i' m that in-spite of everything you've been doing upon me right now...i' m still so in-love...even that loving you is in exchange of crying..
...i think tears fell was enough for me...NOW I SHOULD FIND MY REAL HAPPINESS...
...I SHOULD AND I MUST..
Monday, September 13, 2010
...A lost LOVE...
...Last September 5, a part of me was gone. My AMA (LOLO) died at that date. A part of me said that's ok, coz for always years of suffering he was ready to go back to where he really belong.....September 12, 2010. morning of the said date was a seems to be a family pictorial but what hurts about it is that, yes, we were together with my grandfather, and the sad part o it is that he lies on the coffin.
...At exactly 1:30pm, we start walking towards the end of being with him. I tried to hide the feeling of being left alone. I love my ama so much. I will surely miss everything about him"
He's being malukit...for many things.
He's being suplado at times
He's being seloso for his last few days
He's being palabiro...
He's laughter and a loud voice when he calls my ina
He's story telling about the life of my father..
I miss everything about him..
I know that where ever he is...much laughter will be seen on him..much life will be on him...
..WITH THAT...AMA I, TOGETHER WITH THE REST OF LAHING KALABAW WILL FOREVER MISS YOU...HOPE YOUR STILL WATCHING OVER US...
Saturday, September 12, 2009
Going Back To School
I dont know if it will be good. But I'm eager to go back to school and expend almost 4 years again to study. This coming school year I chose to study again in college with the ideal course for me (I think).
I'm a graduate of Education, just this year (2009) but it seems I'm not that happy for the course, I even working not as a teacher but as a BPA stands for Business Process Associate and I don't want to be in this job for my whole life just because I couldn't apply for more higher job other than this. For me to be able to get a more sophisticated job, I chose to go back to school again to study.
I wish after this I could find a more stable and good job.
Thanks God I have the family who supported me with my plan and not making feel such a black sheep in the family.
I love them....
I'm a graduate of Education, just this year (2009) but it seems I'm not that happy for the course, I even working not as a teacher but as a BPA stands for Business Process Associate and I don't want to be in this job for my whole life just because I couldn't apply for more higher job other than this. For me to be able to get a more sophisticated job, I chose to go back to school again to study.
I wish after this I could find a more stable and good job.
Thanks God I have the family who supported me with my plan and not making feel such a black sheep in the family.
I love them....
Saturday, July 4, 2009
....jUsT mE...
...It's been a long day since the last time, but anyway.
From the day I step up of stage to get my diploma, what makes me think is where and what job should I apply for. Yes of course, many said I should apply for the course I finished, but I'm not 100% sure if I gonna be in love with this job. I believe that if I do not love the job I have, customers will suffer, in case of being a teacher, students will suffer.
That's why I decided to apply for a job which I think will best suit my interest. I applied for the BPA (business processing associate), which in short data encoder. At first I love the job, being in front of the computer and typing and validating some information from the clients. But as soon as I familiarized myself about the project, it seems boring that for almost 8hrs, I' m just in front of the computer and doing almost the same thing.
To be not in negative aspect of the job, I told myself that this is just then the start and many other things will come my way and I will find the right job that will give me what I want.
Like what AMDATEX told us, DREAM BIG STARTS SMALL...
From the day I step up of stage to get my diploma, what makes me think is where and what job should I apply for. Yes of course, many said I should apply for the course I finished, but I'm not 100% sure if I gonna be in love with this job. I believe that if I do not love the job I have, customers will suffer, in case of being a teacher, students will suffer.
That's why I decided to apply for a job which I think will best suit my interest. I applied for the BPA (business processing associate), which in short data encoder. At first I love the job, being in front of the computer and typing and validating some information from the clients. But as soon as I familiarized myself about the project, it seems boring that for almost 8hrs, I' m just in front of the computer and doing almost the same thing.
To be not in negative aspect of the job, I told myself that this is just then the start and many other things will come my way and I will find the right job that will give me what I want.
Like what AMDATEX told us, DREAM BIG STARTS SMALL...
Monday, March 23, 2009
ouch naman!!!
hi long time no blog ah..
i just want to shout what i feel now. I can't tell it to my close friend since she has lots of thing to consider.
You know what, sometime I wish I just be one of his close friend so that he will also treat me like how he treats his friends. But of course, I asked more than that, and I already have it. But for almost 3 years, little by little things changed. And I wish, things come back just like what we are before.
Many times I was asking myself why did God let me be in this position. To become strong?, to have lots of experience?, to have lots of lesson?, a big WHY?.......
Before, we do not have any secrets, we let each other be part of our life, we let each other knows what are the things we experienced or things happened. But now, it seems he let a huge wall be in the middle. There was a feeling in me that, he is doing something that he don't want me to know, even asking for his cell, he will never allow me to have it.
NAGSASAWA NA BA?...just tell me, i don't want this things to continue just because of the pressures around, I want this to continue because you and I want it.
Be honest, you always asking for a TRUST, how could i let you have it, if you are showing things that will have a doubt on me.
I JUST WANT THE SAME PERSON I KNOW BEFORE, AND THE SAME PERSON WHO I GO ALONG WITH BEFORE...
i just want to shout what i feel now. I can't tell it to my close friend since she has lots of thing to consider.
You know what, sometime I wish I just be one of his close friend so that he will also treat me like how he treats his friends. But of course, I asked more than that, and I already have it. But for almost 3 years, little by little things changed. And I wish, things come back just like what we are before.
Many times I was asking myself why did God let me be in this position. To become strong?, to have lots of experience?, to have lots of lesson?, a big WHY?.......
Before, we do not have any secrets, we let each other be part of our life, we let each other knows what are the things we experienced or things happened. But now, it seems he let a huge wall be in the middle. There was a feeling in me that, he is doing something that he don't want me to know, even asking for his cell, he will never allow me to have it.
NAGSASAWA NA BA?...just tell me, i don't want this things to continue just because of the pressures around, I want this to continue because you and I want it.
Be honest, you always asking for a TRUST, how could i let you have it, if you are showing things that will have a doubt on me.
I JUST WANT THE SAME PERSON I KNOW BEFORE, AND THE SAME PERSON WHO I GO ALONG WITH BEFORE...